Whisker (0s):
Today's episode is sponsored By Whisker makers of the Litter Robot, the self cleaning litter box that helps take one more household chore off of your plate because I don't know about you, but this time of year it feels like everyone is trying to get back into a routine. Maybe older kids are heading back to school, childcare schedules might be shifting. Maybe you're just trying to figure out how to get breakfast bottles, solid food naps, dinner, all handled without completely losing your mind. And when your household routine is already packed daily litter box duty is exactly the kind of chore that can tip the whole thing over. The thing that has always stopped me about cats, it's not the cat, it's the litter, the scooping, the smell, the daily maintenance. Because when you already have a baby at home, you're re touching enough questionable things I know. And that is why I love the idea Behind Litter Robot. By Whisker, it automatically cycles after every use so you're not scooping every day and you're not handling waste like you would with a regular litter box. Litter robot handles the dirty work so no one in the house has to be assigned daily litter duty and the Whisker app can notify you about your unit, like when a clean cycle is complete, when the drawer or the litter level needs attention. And it can help you track usage and weight information without checking the litter box every day. I know that I personally love a system that quietly does its job in the background because as parents, we already have enough tabs open in our brains. Right? Whisker has a full lineup of automatic litter boxes with options for single cat homes and homes with up to five cats, including the Litter Robot EVO and Litter Robot five Pro. Maintain your cat's litter while focusing on your family. Learn more about Whisker litter robot models and starter kits today. To get set up for this busy season of parenting, take an additional $50 off bundles with code weaning when you shop Whisker dot com slash weaning. That's an additional $50 off bundles with the code weaning at Whisker dot com slash weaning.

Once Upon a Dance (2m 4s):
This episode is sponsored by Once Upon A Dance. A back to school season always makes me think about routines, not just school routines, but family routines. Like what are we doing before school, after school, before bed, or on the weekends to connect with our kids in ways that feel meaningful. And that's why I'm excited to share Once Upon a Dance With You. Once Upon a Dance offers interactive children's books that combine storytelling with movement. So instead of your child just sitting and listening, they get to step into the story moving, imagining twirling, leaping and engaging their whole body and mind. These books were created by a former dance teacher and they feature her daughter ballerina Kay. As a gentle guide and a positive role model. I really love that mother-daughter connection because I've seen with my own girls how powerful dance can be. So I personally did not grow up dancing, but my girls did and it became such a formative part of their childhood. Once Upon a Dance. Stories include themes like practice, perseverance, confidence, kindness, empathy, friendship, family and self-acceptance, and with dance along adventures featuring everything from unicorns to puppies and cats and more. There's something whimsical and engaging for lots of different kids. So whether you have a baby now, a toddler who loves to move, or older kids who just need a new way to burn energy and connect with you Once Upon a Dance is a beautiful way to make story time active. Swap screen time for connection. Get your kids off the couch and into a story. Jump twirl and leap over to Once Upon a Dance dot com or find Once Upon a Dance books wherever you buy books online that's Once Upon a Dance dot com.

Chriselle Lim (3m 49s):
We actually introduced her to Korean food first because my mom, she was just cooking up all these Korean food when we introduced her to just more basic food without any seasoning. She just wouldn't take it.

Katie Ferraro (4m 4s):
Hey there, I'm Katie Ferraro, registered dietitian, college nutrition professor and mom of seven specializing in baby lead weaning. Here on the Baby Led Weaning with Katie Ferraro podcast. I help you strip out all of the noise and nonsense about feeding, giving you the confidence and knowledge you need to give your baby a safe start to solid foods using baby Led Weaning. Have you ever felt judged for the way you've decided to start solid foods with your baby? Maybe it was a comment from your mom or your mother-in-law about why isn't that baby eating pure and we started purees with you and you turned out fine. Maybe it's another mom at a playgroup who side eyed, You know the strips of meat your baby's eating or the pieces of avocado, they're self-feeding.

Katie Ferraro (4m 48s):
Or Maybe you posted a picture of your baby trying a new food and someone had something not so helpful to say about it. Starting solid foods is already stressful enough without other people weighing in on your choices, right? And when you're trying to figure out baby lead weaning, it can feel like everybody has an opinion on what your baby should be eating, how much they should be consuming, whether or not they're getting enough, and whether or not you are doing this right. In today's episode, we're gonna be talking about mom shaming and how you deal with it when other people just don't get your feeding choices. My guest today is Chriselle Lim Chriselle is a stylist, an entrepreneur.

Katie Ferraro (5m 29s):
She is like an OG content creator who's built this huge platform in the fashion, in the beauty lifestyle and also the parenting spaces. She is also a mom. And what I appreciate so much about Chriselle is that she keeps it real. I like sometimes watch her on social media and I'm like, how does she literally do all this stuff and still look like so put together? She's got this massive audience years of experience like putting her life online, but she's still very honest about how hurtful comments can land differently when they're about your kids and about your parenting choices. In this episode we're gonna be talking about mom shaming and how she's dealt when other people didn't get her choices, and in particular some of her feeding choices.

Katie Ferraro (6m 9s):
This interview was recorded a while back, but her message is still so powerful and I think it resonates so much because the judgment around parenting and feeding decisions has certainly not gone away. In our interview, Chriselle shares about her own feeding journey with her kids, how she introduced Korean foods and family foods, how she navigated milk intake and picky eating phases, and what it's like to handle criticism, especially for someone who lives their lives very online around people who have lots of opinions about your family, your food, and your choices. So whether you have one follower or 1.6 million followers, I think you're really gonna appreciate this conversation about tuning out the noise, trusting yourself, and staying focused on what works for your baby and your family.

Katie Ferraro (6m 52s):
And so with no further ado, here's Chriselle Lim talking about mom shaming and how to deal with others when they don't get your feeding and your parenting choices.

Chriselle Lim (7m 5s):
I am so happy to be here. I've been following you on Instagram and I'm just so excited to be chatting with you. Okay.

Katie Ferraro (7m 11s):
I am so excited to be chatting with you because you have like one of the most varied backgrounds. I don't know how to describe it or do it justice. So could you tell our audience what you do on a professional level and then also the litter bit maybe about your personal and family life, if you don't mind sharing.

Chriselle Lim (7m 23s):
Yeah, absolutely. So I'm Chriselle and most people that follow me on Instagram know me as a content creator because I am one of the OG fashion and beauty content creators that first started on YouTube. I had a blog back in college called The Chriselle Factor, which I documented all of my outfits and going to fun fashion shows. And that was pretty much my whole life for the past, I would say 14 years. And then fast forward six years ago, I became a parent. So I have a 6-year-old and a 2-year-old. And from then on I just kind of shifted gears to focus on finding solutions and providing solutions for busy working parents, which led me to starting my company umo, which we could talk more about into detail later.

Chriselle Lim (8m 10s):
But You know, it's essentially to bring work solutions, parenting solutions for working parents that wanna be co-located with their children while like thriving in their career, still not having to give up one for the other. How

Katie Ferraro (8m 22s):
Did you decide to, I mean that's kind of a transition, right from like beauty blogging, YouTube stuff, like how'd you make that transition into the parenting space? Because I love all your booo stuff, but I'm like, this is not what Chriselle is known for. So like how did that come about?

Chriselle Lim (8m 34s):
Yeah, I mean honestly I started my blog and kind of my, I guess interest in fashion when I was in college. So actually started in high school and then I really kind of followed my passion in college once I left my parents' home and made it into a full-time career that was just on the cusp, like when Instagram was about to be born. I think I was like three years ahead. So I started my YouTube channel and it was just a fun hobby and it really took off. I was one of the first creators to be on that platform talking about fashion and teaching girls my age, how to dress appropriately and like how to buy things for less. And You know, I think at that time that's where my interests lied naturally just because I was a broke college student.

Chriselle Lim (9m 17s):
But You know, a lot of my audience now are also mothers. They've been following me for over a decade and they've just become different, I guess You know, your interests and your hobbies change as you grow. And I think that's the beautiful thing about digital media, especially when you're putting your life out there, your audience kind of grows along with you and that's, You know, my kind of transition into parenthood.

Katie Ferraro (9m 39s):
I love how you've really like dovetailed the parenting stuff in. You're not all up in your face all the time about parenting stuff. Like it's part of who you are, but it's not your total identity. And I think that's important because especially as a full-time working mom who also happens to have seven kids and a business, it's like there's not one thing that defines who you are and you don't totally lose your identity when you become a parent, although a lot of parents can. And I'm wondering if you've experienced that like among your audience or your community. 'cause like I know they appreciate knowing about fashion in the context of also being a parent and that's hard to do from a content standpoint.

Chriselle Lim (10m 11s):
Yeah, absolutely. Honestly, in the beginning I was super nervous because I was like, am I gonna lose all my followers after I become a mom because a lot of my followers are not moms yet. Like are they just gonna lose interest once I become a mother? But quite frankly, the opposite happened. I think because I was one of the first in my age group to have kids. I think a lot of people were just preparing as they're following me. But yeah, I have to agree with you, especially in the early days of motherhood, especially with my first, you kind of lose yourself and that's natural, right? You're just figuring it out, You know, all you like are focused on is like keeping this little tiny baby alive, right? And yourself alive. So you kind of lose yourself during that process.

Chriselle Lim (10m 52s):
But they, I think once you get through that, and I personally went through postpartum depression with my first, and I didn't even know I had it, but after I came out of that I was like, wait a minute, this is me. Like I'm back. Right? And once you realize who you actually are, you're like, I could do both. I could have other interests outside of parenting and outside of my kids and that inspires me to become a better parent. So yeah, it goes hand in hand. I

Katie Ferraro (11m 16s):
Totally agree with that. There's actually another guest on my podcast who was a parenting expert in talking about, You know, do your kids see you having fun when the to-do list isn't done? And I had like tears in my eyes, I was like, well a, the to-do list is never fun. And like maybe not, we were talking about like hobbies and I've always struggled with not having a hobby. I don't have a hobby not related to nutrition. She's like, what did you used to like to do? It's like, I used to like to play piano. She's like, why don't you start doing that? And I actually have started taking piano lessons. I mean, I'm terrible. One of my kids is like, can you please not play when I'm trying to go to sleep? You're so bad. But like it's important for your kids to see you struggling and doing other things. And I think sometimes all my kids see me as like working, but like it is hard to layer in like time with your kids and working and then having hobbies, having a relationship. Like it's a lot. And I really love your content because you don't sugarcoat it like it is hard some days it's not all beautiful and everyone's made up and looks perfect and your kids are well behaved and eat well.

Katie Ferraro (12m 4s):
And that's why I wanted you to come on because I wanted to talk about this concept of mom Shaming, which a lot of us feel, but maybe don't talk about. And I think the way you've dealt with that topic in your content is so helpful. So I was just wondering if from the context of like how we feed our children, what sort of, I don't know, judgment or mom shaming issues, have you faced as a mom of two kids surrounding food?

Chriselle Lim (12m 27s):
Yeah, well I was really insecure going into motherhood because first of all, I didn't really have any friends around me that I could use as an example or a sounding board. So I was kind of figuring it out on all on my own. And to be honest, there's so much information on the internet. So I didn't even look on the internet because I just felt like it was overwhelming me. Honestly, I wish I found you sooner because I feel like you give such tangible tips that moms could actually apply to their lives like immediately. But yeah, there was a lot of moments where I was like, I am embarrassed that I'm doing this. Am I doing it right? And I, I have experienced momum especially because I do put my life out there on the internet so much and there's a lot of opinions of like, oh well you shouldn't be doing this because X, Y, and Z.

Chriselle Lim (13m 9s):
And then another person would say, oh, you're doing great, right? And so you kind of have to block out that noise of everyone's opinion. And of course like, like for me it was asking my mom, right? Like what, what did you go through? And she would give me her advice and obviously it's very different, but yeah, it, there's a lot of mom shaming within the mom community, which is kind of sad. But at the same time you have to do what's best for you. I was a busy working mom, I was building my businesses. I continue to run my businesses even right after birth because I just didn't have the team at the time to be able to support me. And so I worked through all of those days and I couldn't give my, especially my first child the nutrition that I always imagined, I would give her like all the homemade foods and all of that.

Chriselle Lim (13m 58s):
And I, I carried so much guilt and almost sometimes lied to people like, yeah, this is homemade. Like I, I cooked this or I made a lot. And I'm like why am I lying? Like who cares? Right? But now with my second, I'm just a lot more confident, You know, if I am able to make a home cooked meal, great. If I'm not totally fine, right? But yeah, there was a lot of mom Shaming involved.

Hungry Root (14m 19s):
Hey, we're gonna take a quick break, but I'll be right back. This episode is sponsored by Hungry Root. Back to school in our house means we're officially back to the afternoon scramble. It's like my second full-time job, right? The kids come home, homework starts, everyone has practice, they need to be driven places. And somehow in the middle of all that I'm supposed to make dinner. And this is exactly why I keep using Hungry Root. So I've been using Hungry Root long enough now that it really does know how my family likes to to eat. I'm always trying to get more protein into our meals. I want to use less ultra processed food and I need things that are fast and hungry. Root has gotten really good at building my orders around that. What I've also started appreciating more are all of the grocery items that go beyond dinner. So I can get quick lunches, snacks, salad kits, grab and go Foods in the same order especially, which is really helpful now that everyone is back on a schedule. And that's why Hungry Root has really stuck for me. There's over 50,000 chef crafted recipes and more than 1000 grocery items. So I'm not eating the same five things over and over again. And a lot of the recipes are ready in about 15 minutes. And what I love is that Hungry Root keeps learning what we like as a family and then refining what they send me each week. The quality matters too. Hungry Root screens out over 200 additives, like high fructose corn syrup, artificial sweeteners and preservatives and all of their meat and seafood is high quality with no hormones or antibiotics. So at this point, hungry Root means I don't have to think about food logistics on top of everything else. During the Back to School Madness, there's a few dinners that I don't have to plan, shop for and figure out every week. To me that's just a huge win. You are gonna love Hungry Root as much as I do for a limited time. You can get 40% off your first order, plus get a free item in every box for life. Go to hungry root.com/weaning and use code weaning that's hungry root.com/weaning code weaning to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life.

Katie Ferraro (16m 26s):
Do you mind sharing the litter bit about your journey to feeding your own kids? 'cause everyone's story's different with each kid. It's different. Like how did it go for you at the beginning? Yes, the first six months and then how did that change in the second six months? Did you do anything different between your first and second kids?

Chriselle Lim (16m 39s):
Yeah, so my first child, I did breastfeed her for six months and then soon after that I just like wasn't producing enough and I was just stressing myself out. So I was like, You know, I'm just gonna put her on formula. And then from then on we actually introduced her to Korean food first because my mom, she was living with me at the time and she was just cooking up all this Korean food. And so there was actually lots of natural kinda homemade stuff like they Korean food, there's a lot of like squash. So she would make me something while she would make the baby something. So I was very lucky in the sense where my mom was helping me with that. But my struggle was because my first child was so she only knew about these Korean foods.

Chriselle Lim (17m 24s):
I mean not that squash is Korean, but my mom would put seasoning on it and such that when we introduced her to just more basic food without any seasoning, she just wouldn't take it. And so that was my struggle of introducing solids to her was that everything

Katie Ferraro (17m 42s):
You kind of went like the opposite direction. Most people are like start with bland food and then realize, oh my gosh, babies don't have to eat bland food. But you like kind of went back to it. Well

Chriselle Lim (17m 49s):
My child wouldn't eat bland food after that. So like because I realized I was like, oh well she needs to try different things like avocados and all of that. But because she was so used to these like rich flavors already early on she wouldn't take these other types of food. So that was my first, she has become a great eater. She's six years old now, but that was very stressful. And then my second child, I struggled a lot with getting her off the milk. This girl loved her milk. She would not eat any solids. Yeah, I was so stressed out because she's two now. But about like still to this day she'll drink so much milk if we don't like actually put a limitation on her and she's eating the litter better now, but she still has her moments where she'd just rather have milk and that's something that we're struggling

Katie Ferraro (18m 36s):
With. And I swear what you're saying is verbatim what so many parents explain starting in the second year of life. Like the two biggest things that can sabotage toddler intake at mealtime are milk and snacks. It's either too much or too close to meals or someone's giving 'em snacks right before you expect 'em to sit down and eat food. And I think parents, You know, we know like, oh gosh, milk is like a good thing if your family drinks milk. But too much of a good thing is not a good thing. And you're right, some kids can drink, get in the habit of drinking a lot of milk and there's no room in their stomach for anything else and it can become problematic. So I feel the struggle that you're describing,

Chriselle Lim (19m 10s):
This girl can drink milk all day. I'm like, is it even that good? And she just, she just will keep drinking milk. She's a milk monster. So yeah, we had to put her a limitation on her milk intake for that reason. She is eating a bit more, but she's still not eating that much because she'd rather have milk. So. Okay.

Katie Ferraro (19m 28s):
Share the litter bit if you don't mind, about your like day to day with your foods. Does your mom still, you're running like a million different businesses. Is your mom there, does she still help you with food? Do you stress about food preparation for your kids on top of everything else that you're trying to do?

Chriselle Lim (19m 42s):
So yes and no. My mom does come in and out of our house here and there and I'm very lucky 'cause my partner, he is a great cook so he, he loves to cook and so You know, like half the week they'll eat the food that their dad makes. And then for me, I'm not much of a cook. I'll be lying if I said I was a great cook, but I have like my go-tos that I know that they'll eat. So they love spaghetti, like really basic classic spaghetti. I make a really bombed spaghetti in an instant pot and that is the only way I know how to cook, which is so sad. No,

Katie Ferraro (20m 15s):
It's perfect for baby led winging like all the best baby foods come out of the Instant Pot, like

Chriselle Lim (20m 18s):
It's great. Oh yes, I love my instant pot. I can make like pretty much breakfast, lunch and dinner in my instant pot and the kids will eat it. So yeah, I have like my five go-to meals that the kid I know the kids will eat. Like for me as a busy working mom running multiple businesses, my goal is just to make sure that they get their food intake. So I unfortunately don't have like the bandwidth to try out different types of foods though when my mom does come, she always tries to like put something in here and there 'cause she loves cooking. But for me, I kind of have my like five go-to things that I make, which is like salmon, a rice and noodle soup with veggie chicken stock and then a spaghetti.

Chriselle Lim (20m 59s):
Like those are my go-to. Okay,

Katie Ferraro (21m 1s):
So Chriselle, you have big platforms, big audiences, lots of big ideas, big business stuff. But at the end of the day you're still a mom, you're still a person. And I think people don't realize the bigger your platform gets, it sometimes hurts even more when you get one or two comments that like despite the millions and millions of positive things people are saying, someone will kind of needle you. Like I can't believe you're doing that with kids or this with kids, or how do you deal with that when sometimes that one little comment can just like almost feel like undo all of the amazing work that you're doing. What's your coping mechanism for that?

Chriselle Lim (21m 33s):
Well I have to say, as you continue to put yourself out there, you definitely do have, and you will naturally kind of get used to getting some negative feedback. And it's something that you just kind of have to realize are the realities of putting your life on the internet. And I'm sure you do too, especially talking about, You know, children and babies. It's such a sensitive topic. And I, with that said, I have always been really good about managing my emotions when people would say things badly about me or like they didn't like how I dressed or my makeup or whatever. Like I was like, okay, whatever, it's fine. But once I had kids and they would start saying things about my children or something about, I remember this one time some anonymous commenter was saying, your child has such chinky eyes.

Chriselle Lim (22m 27s):
I was like, is anyone else saying this? Like that's racist. You can't say that on the internet. And it's not to me, it's to my child, right? And so those type of comments obviously kind of boil me up one, because they're not about me, they're about my kids. But my community, they are so strong for me. And because I've been around for over like a decade on the internet, I feel like whenever those comments come through, my community does come back me up and they just kind of support me and I don't usually have to say anything. And they'll kind of be like, there's

Katie Ferraro (23m 1s):
Self-policing that goes on when your community gets big enough, but you build it the right way with the right people. I see all the time people are like, how do you run literally the largest digital community dedicated to baby led weaning without people being haters? Because baby Led Weaning has such this reputation of being judgmental. I'm like, because the people that are here are here to learn and they're treated with respect and they treat others with respect. And so the second someone comes at me or someone who's on one of my platforms, they do the self-policing. It's kind of amazing. I mean there is some moderation of course you need to do and some platforms are not as conducive to that as others, but it's one of the reasons why I love Instagram. It is such a positive space for learning about babies as opposed to some of the other ones, which are a lot harder that you are doing a great job in.

Chriselle Lim (23m 43s):
Well I think you're doing an incredible job and I think it's so much trickier when you're kind of sharing advice that You know, that works, but another mother or another parent might think otherwise. And I could see how that could be kind of become a heated debate. Whereas for me as a creator individual, I'm not necessarily giving out facts all the time or necessarily advice, but it's just a lot of the comments, the hateful comments or the hurtful comments are about like how they look or how and You know, I could live with that. I could like see pass through that.

Katie Ferraro (24m 18s):
Any final tips for moms feeling the pressure, feeling like they're getting judgment, especially about the way that they're deciding to feed their baby. Like you have a really nice way of clearly having thick skin. Like what can they do to deflect some of that mom shame or the mom guilt they might feel about their feeding choices and decisions?

Chriselle Lim (24m 37s):
You know, I have opinions on people posting things on the internet just because when you do so you are subject for criticism and you just have to know that going into it. Of course we live in an era where we post quite frankly everything about ourselves and our lives on the internet, right? I'm guilty of that as well. But as I kind of see it in hindsight now, I'm like, maybe I didn't have to post that, right? It stressed me out so much of what other people were saying. So I think you just have to be really smart about what you do post, because when you do post something, you are opening yourself up to become more vulnerable, to become attacked.

Chriselle Lim (25m 18s):
And that is something that you just have to know that it's part of it. So I think more so being smart about what you do choose to post and once you do, it's kind of, you just have to expect things to come your way. So yeah,

Katie Ferraro (25m 33s):
And I know we discovered each other mutually on Instagram and I think there's such a powerful visual associated with that platform, especially the power of seeing babies feed themselves and a lot of parents who don't post a lot. One of the few things that they will do is the new food that their baby is trying every day. And I encourage them to do that. Listen, this is your reality, this is your truth. This is how you prepared pork for your baby in the seven month of life. And you are actually inspiring other parents who think, gosh, I didn't realize babies could eat all of these different foods. And so even if you're a micro influencer, your behaviors and your actions, if that's how you're feeding your baby and that's how you choose to share it, more power to you.

Chriselle Lim (26m 15s):
Yeah, I love that. And I love getting ideas from other parents that do posts about feeding their babies. And that's something that I do love seeing because I get a lot of my ideas from the internet. So You know, I don't want to discourage anyone to not post, right? But just setting expectations when you do posts that people are gonna say things and that's okay as long as you feel good about the choices that you make, you can't be perfect. And yeah, so

Katie Ferraro (26m 41s):
Chriselle, tell our audience where they can can go to learn more about your work, especially the Bumo line. 'cause I think that's really of interest to a lot of our parents are working parents, that's why they're on a podcast trying to learn about baby Led Weaning. 'cause they don't have all day to do it themselves.

Chriselle Lim (26m 53s):
Yeah. So if you guys wanna learn more about me, my Instagram is at Chriselle Lim Bumo has actually several Instagram handles, but if you're interested in the coworking space, which is opened at Century City, that is at Bumowork. And then if you're interested in the virtual learning program, which is quite frankly the most amazing virtual learning program for early little learners, it's at Boom O Brain. And then our community page is at Bumo Parrot. So I know it's a handful, but those are the places that you could find us and me. Awesome.

Katie Ferraro (27m 26s):
Thank you so much. And I will link to everything Chriselle is mentioning, including all of her handles. 'cause you really have such a varied background of different businesses, it's really impressive. But yet they are all integrated with the same message that you can do this with the litter bit of help. It'll all be on the show notes for this episode@blwpodcast.com. Well, I hope you guys enjoyed that interview with Chriselle Lim. For somebody with such a massive online platform, she's incredibly down to earth. I really appreciated her candor. She's just really a real person. And I'm gonna put the references, the resources, and where you can find her online. It'll all be up on the show notes that you can find@blwpodcast.com/138

Airwave Media (28m 6s):
and a very special thank you to our partners at AirWave Media. If you guys like podcasts that feature food and science and using your brain, check out some of the podcasts from AirWave Media. We're online@blwpodcast.com. Thanks so much for listening and I'll see you next time.

NBC (28m 27s):
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